I’m not finished yet, I need to add tiles in a few spots and polyurethane the heck out of it….
which I would have done but I couldn’t get the polyurethane open, that push and turn is hard for older hands but I’ll ask for help when I’m ready to expose myself to the fumes …I did buy a mask and will use it..
The shower wall looks paper thin and coming apart in one corner so I need to find a way to cover or repair to prevent the avoided at all costs water damage, and the floor all 14 x 16 inches of it still has the ugly white tile on it.
It feels odd not to have the mirror over the sink but I’m getting used to it, that wall was in such bad shape it was better to cover it all up with my hand-made tiles.
I added a blue framed door mirror behind the toilet and the second picture is with the door open so you see outside the door into my mini-bathroom.
I dedicated a series of images of a floral paintings some years ago that I thought represented the cycle of interstitial cystitis. Kind of silly perhaps but if you look at the first flower it looks like then the mood begins to worry and then there’s pain and worst pain then slowly improves but one is always watchful until the cycle starts again. These are all images of the same painting digitally modified to produce the changes that to me represent pain.
It’s a Bear, it sEeps your life awayConstant pAin it changes your liFeyour mOod your futureInviSible to the outside but you look Fine nEed toUrinateconstantlycan’t slEEep can’t have seXwithout feArofpain Afraid to eEatafraid afraid afraid
All this and more is the face of interstitial cystitis.
I have had interstitial cystitis for more than 20 years. I am one of the lucky ones, most are not so fortunate, my disease has not progressed and I’m stable on the medication I take daily, would I be if I didn’t take the medication? I don’t think so, I have tried to decrease my meds but when I do i have a flare so from 10 mg of amitriptyline I have gradually had to increase to 100 mg over the years. It hasn’t been an easy burden to live with, the first 5-8 years were the worst with frequent flares now much less if I’m cautious about what I eat, avoid stress (which is difficult to manage in our busy lives, but for many they don’t have busy lives because this has changed lives)
I am writing this now because a reader wrote that he has IC and it has progressed. He thought that a note from someone whose condition has not gotten worse but has improved with less frequent flares would be encouraging to other IC’ers, I hope this helps and if anyone would like to talk to me about it please contact me here and I’ll be happy to share what I know about IC.
I can go for weeks without the urge to write here until I have all these simple thoughts accumulated and it’s time to purge.
I know that sounds rude.
They are not big thoughts but…..
I want to be more cognizant of the fact that now I can do anything,
do whatever or not do anything at all
with no limits but those I put on myself,
to not be afraid of doing something stupid.
I want these years I have left to grow towards greater understanding of myself and life around me and not be satisfied with just passing the time pleasantly.
I want more.
Oh, I’ll tell you about my fingers getting crooked, ( I just noticed my little pinky is bent) the hassles I encounter and details of living my life, but every now and then I hope for a spark of something worth sharing.
Surely a 76 year old woman must have something to share of value.
(birthday coming up, no longer just only a 75 year old)
I do go on and on about my age don’t I, somehow my age makes me relevant here.
Touch up paint messes I’m a sloppy painter, just ask my sister!
Finish bathroom shower scrub out the pink color accidently sprayed there
varnish tiles in the bathroom and decide what to do with the new tiles
work on my quilt that I’m making, covering an old quilt with Indian fabric that I love.
staple fabric to front seats, yah not sure how this will work out
read a chaper of ‘don Quijote in Spanish
Figure out how to add those things so the door doesn’t fall on my head or hold open.
Tighten the cubicles in loft last time I moved they moved too when they should not have moved
Buy wine beer and food. The fridge is empty
Get the toad asap
Why list this stuff here? It’s for myself to remind myself that I have things to do! Important things too. But most importantly Get the Toad!
You like that hat? I paid $100 for it at a Duluth MN art fair so I must wear it, it is beautifully hand made by Patti Berg original. It was hard to choose just one hat. this is an older photo of the hat and me. I like it better.
But there is one part of myself that questions if this isn’t a selfishness on my part. I’m not contributing anything but my thoughts to anyone and my thoughts aren’t worth much, even to me. The freedom to do or not to do anything at all may just make me a lazy person. What can I do to make better thoughts to share? My daily activities are mundane, not much to share about so I have to think my thoughts and try to put them in words that mean something or express how this old woman perceives the world around her.
I once expressed to my husband (long ago )that I would like to spend some time sitting under a tree on a mountain all alone to think my thoughts. He found it hurtful to not be included under that tree. Maybe that is what I have found here, though not alone, here I can be alone, and I can sit under a tree on a mountain if I so chose.
This is a perfect situation for me until it is not and then I’ll leave.
So far I have no desire to leave, is that because I have no place to go?
I love my RV but she’s old, needs care and redesigning some aspects of her will improve my Quality of Life. Very Important to me.
My problem was keeping things where I put them while I am driving. Everything tended to crash about making driving a very scary affair, imagine you hear stuff sliding about and book cases tipped over and you have to turn a corner and stuff moves again. Turning corners is the worst! Of course I did use bunggy cords where I had a way to connect them to something solid. Velcro failed me as did the white hooks I invested in so many devices to hold stuff but nothing worked that well until Jose came and solved the problem. I’m not sure but we (I) may have to face a problem that is the result of solving problem number one.
I’ll tell you what was done.
Jose made one side of the RV into one long table and added a board to the wall of the RV into which the bookcases could be screwed into, making them very secure.
This RV is only 22 feet counting the cab so all the working parts are located under something else. The fresh water tank is under the table just built. On each side of the water tank are two boxes that we aren’t sure what is in them. Maybe the water pump could be under one of them. The water heater is on the other side under the bed, (since I’ve fallen twice from my ‘loft’ I’ve made my bed downstairs!). My water pump works now but I don’t need it when I’m hooked up, hope it keeps working when I need it and doesn’t need replacing cuz that could be a problem if its under the table Jose built as I don’t think he’ll be back to take it all apart !
An amazing friend I hadn’t seen in 12 years came from Austin to Truth or
Consequences NM to help me. Thank you José, much appreciated.
New friends are a blessing, meet Robert, my neighbor,
making new friends at this time of life is very special, why? Because you have less time to waste.