Questioning my Good Sense


Why the hell did I do that?

I don’t understand how I could have thought it was a good idea to bid on a 31-foot class A RV. IMG_4639.jpg

Why was my thinking so far off?  I liked the huge front windshield looking over everyone with a clear view ahead, and it looks really nice inside, roomy..32 feet. But it left out any information of the inner workings, the motor, the tires, generator, battery.  so much left out should have been a cautionary note that I missed.

I’ve been looking for a rig of about 20 feet or less so I can feel confident in my ability to drive it.

I know this.

Yet I bid $9,200  or so and no one outbid me. I’m trying to understand what prompted me to make a bid when the item was impossible for me to drive and I am not ready to start living in an RV.  My sister says it reminds her of when I called her to tell her I’d shaved my head.  I had to live with that for a long time., and it still gets referenced.  They think I’m goofy but I was taking Ambien at the time and one does strange things in their sleep while under its influence.

Could this new life adventure, living full time in a van be another goofiness?  I’m not taking medication that would account for any goofiness.

But as I think about this I remember another time when my behavior could have been the  result of  medication…which I still take. The literature noted that one could have unusual behavior and could take risks  or start gambling I was very sensual and even  inappropriate, but to be very honest I had a great time, to the embarrassment of some.    Nothing wrong with a 65 year old woman feeling sensualI’ll remember those days with fondness and without embarrassment.)and a little sad that time has past.

I will have to start monitoring and questioning my behaviors. At least when there is money or sex involved.C2788275-1385677966428693medium

A Remedy for a tough Financial Situation? A Disaster in the Making,Was it the wine?

IMG_4648.jpg                      31 feet .

It looks very nice inside but the information on it is very scant.  Does it need new tires?  Does it even run?  Questions to consider before hitting the bid button.

‘reserve not made’

It’s my only hope

Please someone bid higher than $9,200 I need to be outbid  before 11 hours when the bidding is over.

What was I thinking?

Was it the wine

31 feet,

I’ll be  on pins and needles until bidding is over in 11 hours.

I suppose if I  back out of this situation  ( or even be able to back up this rig, 31 feet) they won’t let me bid anymore,

E bay will be mad  the owner will be mad and I’am mad at myself.

I’d never bid or even  been on the E bay site  before my MacBook Pro died  and I needed a computer  I bought my MacBook refurbished on Ebay ( I didn’t know that the back light on the keys made such a difference).

I saw where another woman, older than I, who bought her rig on E bay site unseen and is very happy with her choice.  Don’t know what her family thought about that, I’m pretty  sure what mine would think, I hope I never have to tell my kids about this,  I don’t think they read here.so I may get away with this  situation. .It would reinforce their concerns about my ability to manage living alone and driving  a RV.

I have a surprise for them,  I may not be alone.  Now  it would be nice if  it was a big strong man traveling with me to do all the tough stuff but no, she is a strong woman with whom I’ll be sharing the tough stuff.  She is my adventure seeking sister in-law who loves  nature, is up to take a  road less traveled,  is strong and is in the same financial situation I’m in.  Not a good place to be in at our age, life happens and there we are in a difficult pocket of time. ( not sure what that means but I like how it sounds.)

Finding a situation where there are 2 comfortable sleeping areas is a concern.  Two woman traveling together, living together need some separation and privacy but these RV’s are not made for 2 people who are not sleeping  in  the same bed.

2002 Coachmen Mirada 300QB Used

2002 Coachmen Mirada 300QB Used

help!  OMG my bid has been removed and I am no longer responsible for this 31 foot  home.  Help has arrived! I thank the dealer who forgave me, he even thanked me for letting him know there was a problem.  The problem being me.

75 y/o single female failed to plan for her future and NOW wonders why she let that happen.

APC_0024.jpgIs it too late to be making a plan? Finally starting to think about my years after 76.  I know what I’ll do during my 75th, I’ll be making plans,  after that one year will just follow the previous. Time will keep passing by, who will I be in this next phase, will I accomplish anything of value to another person, what are my options. And why did I let this happen to me?  Never thought I’d be single at this age but divorces are a step into the unknown.  I haven’t made any effort to find a new love or husband,  I’m a happy single That is not my goal, I’ve been a resource for my kids when they needed me.  They need to be my resource now.

I don’t think I’m alone when I say I never wanted a long life and suddenly now I’m 75 how did that happen!!. I don’t want to live too long.  And if I do live too long I hope to be functioning at a high level and then drop dead…the wish of all us oldsters.  No pain no drama just be here one day and gone the next.

Odd to think that you won’t be there anymore?

forgotten?

Mourning,  New topic

Different cultures mourn in different ways.  In Panama, I noted that there are certain guidelines (mostly from the ‘church) on the wearing of black, then purple and finally white clothes over a specific time frame to indicate the stage of mourning.  If you wear black it is assumed you are in mourning even if you just like your little black dress. I wore a black dress because I liked it and was asked several times ‘who died’

I may be back in another lifetime to work out whatever problems I’ve caused in this lifetime.  I want to doIMG_4639.jpg better in my next life, many agree, we have to pay in one birth or another for the errors we commit while here.

I keep my Buddha close to remind me to be kind in any situation the only words of wisdom I’ve learned these many years, (and not always been true to myself,)  are just two words, be kind.

Just Be Kind. 

Feeling Stuck, Guess I’ll organize my Paint

I know what I need to do  but I’m having trouble getting things done, or doing things that have no relationship to what needs doing.

I have four 20 x 20 inch good canvases that I should paint something fantastic on but I’m afraid I’ll make a mess so I haven’t even tried to paint anything on them, instead I spend time organizing my paints.  My studio is a mess so I’m sure that will be my next project  wasting  time  before getting started painting.

I  need to watch some videos to get ideas to find my way back into a painting.  The whole moving plan has my mind distracted from the steps I need  to have a successful  move, a successful future on the road.

I’m assuming you know about my plan to buy an rv and live in it blissfully making my way around the country side selling my art…tailgateart, here and there now and then and forever thankful for the idea that could work for me and my old age life.

I”ll start making lists, it’s so nice to be able to scratch them off as they are completed. I feel very excited about my new life plan and wish I had everything ready now but it looks like I won’t be able to go forward until May.  Meanwhile I need to sell some paintings . And make prints to sell. And take my stuff to the market to sell.  And add photos of my work to our neighborhood news.

One unsettling problem I’ve had is that my computer died and took along with it my photos    Some but not all I’ve found in the cloud and can use them for prints, but the separate  albums I”d make of family and friends is gone.    I have an external hard drive but honestly I don’t know how to use it, everyone says just plug it in, but how to I know what is happening.  I bought a refurbished MacBook  so I’ll try to see what is on the hard drive using this newish computer.

Late note

Another failure computer wise, can’t find my pictures on the external disc, says I have no permission to see what’s there.  I tried to correct permissions but couldn’t.   Guess I’ll go organize my paint .IMG_3507.jpgIMG_3512.jpg

Searching on Ebay for my Home?

Every day I spend hours on my computer searching on Ebay for my new home.

Since when does Ebay sell homes?

It depends on how you define home.  For me,   being ‘homeless’ in one sense, just means starting a new life style that I am excited about and plan  to start in the next few months.

Doing my research, learning what this will entail, what I will need to be safe and how I will finance my new home.  My budget is not large nor is my income so I need to look carefully and not get overly enthusiastic at what I see today and  buy something I will not have a place  to park until I’m ready to roam.  (Which reminds me I need to update my passport as I want to spend time in Mexico).  I’m spending time on-u- tube reading the many blogs out there written by people who are  full time rv’ers.

One excellent resource is “Bob” of cheaprvliving.com.  He is the main guru of rv living and shares his years of experience living full time on public lands for free, he gives good information and is  well regarded in the community.  And there is community in this population, and it is growing.

I notice that there is a rather large number of older single woman who have taken this life style  .  Whether with limited resources or plenty,they report that they are happy  and only regret  not taking the leap to do this years  ago. Some even older than I am. (gasp)

You might think that these are just homeless people living in their car, or van and some are for sure.  But those   I’ve watched on their tube channels are not feeling homeless,   Many have    monetized  their utube channel and make videos of their travels and share their experiences good and not so good.  And it’s not just people over 65 retired, plenty of young people manage to work remotely from their rv and travel while working.

It’s not for everyone.

But I believe that I have the personality to live this way.  I’m an independent introvert, some might even say recluse, I  live in my head too much and this could be even therapeutic , not that I need  therapy!

I need to learn about generators, solar panels, holding tanks of water, gray and black tanks and how to manage heating and cooling and most importantly, how to drive one.

The only thing I regret is my age and there is nothing I can do about that and I’ll just get older.  Starting at 75 is not ideal, but I am ready now and excited to get started.IMG_1622

What is the Big Deal about Giclée Prints?

  

What are giclée prints?

(pronounced zhee-clay)

This is a type of inkjet printing meant to produce a product at a higher quality with a longer lifespan than a standard desktop inkjet printer.

Three basic criteria

  • The print needs to be 300 dots per inch to insure the sharpest detail
  •  The paper used must be of archival quality and acid free.   Professional series papers are more expensive than plain white copy paper. Epson papers are among the finest papers to use.  If you are buying a giclee print confirm the type of paper it is printed on.
  • A giclee print  is printed on a large format printer using pigment based inks.  Pigment based inks have a longer lifespan, can last from 100 to 200 years without significant fading

The advantage to artists producing their work as a giclee print is that is can be created ‘on demand’.  Only printing one print at a time.

They are more expensive to produce, and more expensive to buy.

  •  Ink is more expensive, a new set of inks cost $140.00 for my Epson Artisan 1430.
  •  The printer is more expensive, $350 instead of $89. (still a good deal but I use it only for prints and use my hp for other needs)
  • The paper is much more expensive.

I have the Epson Artisan 1430 and can print up to 13′ x 19′ prints and I use Epson inks and Epson art papers

This Information is taken from an article at Creative Blog Art and Design inspiration.  creativeblog.com

 

 

I don’t know how to add comments!

I can’t seem to add a comment that was made on my facebook page or sent to my email, seems they have to be added here under comments.  so I’m adding Janet’s comment here.

Comment: Living in El Real was the most amazing experience of my life – (with the exception of birthing and raising my children, of course)! As you mention above, Bob an I spent most of our time upriver, working with the Choco Indians. We had several projects in El Real, however, the most successful being an English class. One of the students went on to work with the Smithsonian Institute, at Barro Colorado Island, attributing his ability to get the job to his English-speaking ability. He is now retired. I have seen him three times through the years since leaving Panama, and he calls me every couple months.

Time: January 13, 2018 at 9:51 am

Contact Form URL: https://tailgateart-othon.com/2018/01/10/the-town-of-el-real-de-la-santa-maria-1965/
Thanks, Janet!  Got more stories?

Tomorrow’s Market & Kira Ishi Rocks

Tomorrow will be the first time for me to manage my TailGateArt market by myself.  Thankfully Shar will be able to help me get set up and take down and all I have to do is sell. Hoping for a nice day, the weatherman says yes, no snow or rain expected and temps in the 70’s.

My paintings will be on super sales as low as I can go to decrease my inventory.  I want to paint more landscapes and play with different techniques, there are so many options for the artist now, so much to learn.

I’m excited to start making prints of my paintings to sell.  I  bought a  printer that can make prints up to 16 x 20 (almost).  Expecting it any day now, I’m hopeful because I have a  had problems with my  printers.  I guess I’ve had about 6 or so printers over the years and they have all been a source of frustration,  I am a little concerned but determined to give this a try and if it works out as I expect I’ll sell my prints and note cards here too.

I’ll have Shar’s  kira ishi (small shiny rock in Japanese) rocks for sale tomorrow,  they have been a popular item especially for kids.

Some people think  “$5 is too much for a rock” without thinking about the skill needed to produce these beautiful rocks.  Depending on the size of the rock they cost from 50 cents to $5.00.

Costly and exotic Japanese, Thai, Indian and Nepalese papers are used to create her Kira ishi rocks and she finishes with multiple layers of varnish.

All the papers have a name, the Japanese Yuzen papers have names like Jewels, jasmine, Happiness, Midnight crane and Panda bear and many more.

The Nepalese papers are made from the Lokta bush.  Lokta paper is strong and durable and Eco-friendly and called the Nepal paper plant.

The Thai papers are made of the most luxurious Kozo momi papers that are hand marbled with stunning color combinations including metallic gold ribbons.  They have names of earth events with appropriate colors as noted below.  These are the rocks I was making but Shar makes them better than I do so she is the rock maker master.

IMG_0476 (1)

And that’s my story for today!